Friday, 23 October 2009

Who will like an useless pig?

Here I guess, there must be many of them who dislike me? Am I right? Who will like a person who looks like a pig, and yet useless... I am weird, always alienate others... Maybe others alienated me? An eccentric? Somehow, I am.

Most of time I'm reticent in new surrounding or environment that I'm not familiar with, or I should say, I can only talk to those who I knew. I need to know about a person at a certain level then only I can speak, openly to, as well as accept them. But, do they accept me?

People are avoiding me? Are they?
People hate me? Dislike me? Do they?

Or I'm not worth to be a friend?

Am I too pessimistic?

Or they treated me this way only for the reason, I AM A PIG?

Appearance is the boundary to make friends? Isn't it? My appearance bothered the most, am I right? Yes, no doubt, it's a yes, for everyone, even me myself.



These questions always running in my head,
they never disappear.


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或许……吧。

想了很久,我觉得我的心可能生病了。 ……慢慢地觉得不快乐越来越多。 大概说出来,人家会觉得我矫情吧。 或许真的是矫情吧。 这一年……一年多来困扰我的事情,或许就播下了种子吧。 忧郁吗?不像。我能从网上挖到的、读到的……似乎我的状况不多吧。 我没有看医生的打算,也没有想死的念头。看...